You may or may not have seen Tiffany Brien's recent Facebook post, which includes screenshots of messages she received from 'Ellie'. If you haven't seen it then I recommend that you go in search of it and have a read, merely to show you how you should NOT act as a human being, and as a reality check on just how cruel this world can be. 'Ellie' appears to be someone hiding behind a fake account, who basically claims that Tiffany is false, that all her photos have been edited, that she is where she is now because of her father, and not because she worked for it. To be honest, you won't fully believe the extent of it until you read it.
The incident got me thinking about the world we live in today, and how critical we are, not only of ourselves, but also of each other. I, so frequently, think to myself about what others say about me, not to the point that I care, but when I'm blogging and subsequently posting on social media, I wonder how many times there have been screenshots sent into group chats and the likes. Especially when I'm talking on Snapchat - that is still something which makes me so nervous, but I love watching other bloggers on it, and I know that by pushing myself to do it, I will generate more interest in my blog because people will get to see me for me.
I'm lucky that so far I haven't had to deal with any 'haters', at least not directly, but I'm sure that as I continue to blog and put some aspects of my life into the public eye, then it will invite some trolls to pick faults in me and my work. But why should they? And why should we allow them?
The answer is that we shouldn't! Who is anyone else to tell us how we should live our lives, that we aren't perfect (because no-one is), that they don't like our Instagram or what we post on Snapchat? I'm a firm believer in doing what is right for you despite what other people think, and that's what I aim to do. One of the reasons I started blogging was because when I was growing up I always had people asking for advice and tips, be it make-up related, fashion related, or just about life in general. I am by no means the perfect example, I very much have my flaws, but I was always flattered in these situations, and thought that if I could write content that would help other people, namely other girls, I would be doing a good deed.
I'm sure you've all heard the saying 'If you don't have anything nice to say, then don't say anything at all' and I so wish that more people would take this on board. We all say things we shouldn't, but I really do make a conscious effort now that I'm older to remove myself from situations where people are being bitchy and putting others down. I personally think this world is difficult enough without having people run you to the ground. And people are so quick to judge before they would take a step back and put themselves in your shoes. I mean, when I say that I still struggle with talking on Snapchat, I sometimes record what I want to say ten times before I actually post it because I think someone will find a fault with it, and it could be something as simple as the lighting makes my face look rounder, or they will criticise me for saying 'Hey everyone!' in an over-enthusiastic tone of voice. I shouldn't be afraid of that, and I find it terrible that I'm sometimes overwhelmed by the pressure of what others will think, instead of being myself.
I urge you to think twice the next time you are about to criticise someone in any way. It could be that they've put on weight and you are about to comment on it, but how do you know that they haven't just been through a really difficult time and were comfort eating as a result of it? Let them comfort eat, I'm sure when they feel strong enough to eat properly, their diet, and their weight will regulate themselves. And if you think about criticising me for trying to make something of myself by owning my own business and blogging about myself and my life, think about how hard it was for me to begin in fear of what other people would think, and the impact it has on myself and others. I find it very therapeutic at times, and when others can relate to what I'm posting, I definitely feel like I'm having a positive effect on a pretty cruel world.
Us girls should strive to empower each other and not knock each other down. Stand by your girls, support them in whatever they do, and worry about making yourself a better person, not making others look worse. Kudos to Tiffany for handling the 'Ellie' situation so well - she is such a good role model, and if more people invested time in achieving what she has, then I have no doubt that indeed the world would be a better place.
Now go tell your girls how much you love them!
Thanks for reading,
Friday’s Giirl
x
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