Let me start by telling you this - those twelve weeks have been nothing short of a rollercoaster ride, and have been anything but easy. Combine the pressure of starting a new job with a break from my relationship, and the result will be tears, heartache, over/under-eating, oversleeping, and just generally not being in a very healthy state.
Image © Google
I am by no means writing this post to receive sympathy from anyone, I can assure you all that everything is great now. I adore my job and the people who work there, and my boyfriend and I have overcame our difficulties and are happily back together again. But the reason I am writing it is to make you aware that we all go through trying times - there is no-one immune to such.
I don't see any downsides to being a blogger (you wouldn't do it if you didn't love it), but I guess it isn't easy pretending to be okay when you put your life out there into the public eye. And what more, it is very frustrating when you stumble upon an obstacle and it prevents you from achieving your goals/deadlines. For example, remember that 12-week transformation I started back in May? Yea, me too, but I didn't get to complete it. You might wonder why, why would I let something get in the way of my dreams? Well, obviously it isn't intentional, but sometimes you just aren't mentally or physically prepared for such instances.
As I already said, I was both overeating and undereating, which meant my 'diet' went out the window. Some days I found comfort in eating chocolate and biscuits, and other days I didn't feel like eating anything at all. As you can imagine, either way I did not feel like undertaking any form of training, and I don't think I would have had the strength even if I wanted to. But in my opinion, this wasn't important in the grand scheme of things. What was more important to me was ensuring that I looked after my physical and even more so, my mental wellbeing. Bearing in mind that I have shared with you my experience of mental illness, I have taught myself that it's okay to do what will make me happy and if that means eating a share size bar of chocolate PLUS a doughnut , then I will. I know it isn't a healthy choice, but I also know that it's a one-off and I am otherwise a healthy eater.
I want to draw your attention to the fact that I didn't share any of these moments with you as they happened - when my eyes were bloodshot from crying, when I ate that massive bar of chocolate followed by a doughnut, or the nerves before my first day at my new job. These are the moments we choose to hide, these are the moments that will ruin our picture-perfect Instagram feed, and these are the moments that will showcase our weaknesses. BUT, these are the moments that make us human and not just a multitude of squares on the worldwide web. For me, these are the moments I have overcame and the moments which have made me stronger.
Image © Google
Trust me when I say that everyone goes through difficult times - we all want to look like we have the most perfect lives, but the most 'perfect' lives have their flaws too. Nobody's perfect, and it's important to remember that when you are getting it tough. Don't feel bad about eating that bag of sweets* - if it helps you get through then do it. I'm sure you'll be able to work it off when you are in a better frame of mind.
So I'm back and I'm ready to blog more than ever. I'm not ashamed to admit that I've had a tough summer and needed some time away from everything, but I think it's important to show who I really am behind all the social media.
Thank you for reading and I'll be back with another post real soon (not after another twelve weeks).
Friday’s Giirl
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*DISCLAIMER: I do not promote binge/comfort eating on a regular basis for obvious reasons but I do believe that we (us girls especially) need the odd chocolate bar now and again.
