LIFE : Where Have I Been?

If you follow me on Instagram or Facebook you may have seen my recent post about being a little MIA from social media, and from life in general, due to taking more time for myself, and in turn hoping to discover who I am and what I want in life. I’ve been considering my location, my work, my relationships, to name a few, but also my blog. 

I started this a few years ago now, I’m not sure exactly when, but I feel like throughout those few years I’ve dipped my feet in and out yet never really fully jumped in. I’ve always got a little overwhelmed by it all - the market has become so saturated and there are so many people who blog for likes, for self-gratification, to be Insta-famous, for the wrong reasons in my opinion. It’s viewed as an easy life, sure you just get sent products to review and you upload the odd photo, and other than that you do nothing. The dream, eh? Successful bloggers work damn hard, they don’t do it for the freebies, they don’t cash in on the amount of likes they get, and I certainly did not start this for any of those reasons - not for an ‘easy’ career, not to not have to go to work, not to wake up to a million followers. 

I’ve quite often felt disheartened by thinking that I’m not good enough or there isn’t a place for me in the world of blogging. But I try to remember why I started in the first place, and it took talking to a friend recently to re-ignite the spark in me that I had lost. Initially I started it because I wanted to help people. I had a real interest in both fashion and beauty and I regularly had girls messaging me asking for advice on make-up products, fashion, I would have even had girls asking me to help them pick out an outfit for a wedding or a night out. I loved to help and I thought I could maybe help a wider audience by creating my own little space online. 

I wrote a little about fashion and beauty and I then introduced some fitness, health and lifestyle as my interests started to vary. I still however didn’t find my place and I’ll admit there has been no consistency to what I’ve posted, although,that said, I don’t think that will change because of my lifestyle. I have varied interests and hobbies, and due to being self-employed I don't have much routine, some days I work two hours, other days I work twelve. And blogging will always revolve around that. 

Why am I telling you all this? Because I still want to blog, I still feel like I have a purpose to do so. I still want to help people, but I feel like my focus is going to change slightly. 

When I do get overwhelmed and disheartened I try to remind myself that although I’m doing this to help people, I’m doing it because I want to, for me. And the best I can do is be myself. Not feel like I have to fit in (to be honest, I’ve always liked to be a little different anyway) or like I have to be a certain way for social media. I’m a little bit of everything - some days I’m confident, some days I’m sick with anxiety, some days I want to go out and socialise and other days I want to be in my gym gear walking in the middle of a forest.

It feels only fitting that my blog is a reflection of that and so it still will be a little bit of everything. But my focus will be less on what I think I should be posting, doing what every other fashion or beauty blogger is doing, and more on helping others because at the end of the day, that’s why I started and that’s still why I want to do it. 

So come walk with me on my journey, come with me as I discover myself, as I make mistakes, as I learn, and hopefully together we can make sense of this crazy life.  

Friday’s Giirl

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